Tuesdays with Jacob

Read Genesis 32:16-18 – Then he delivered them to the hand of his servants, every drove by itself, and said to his servants, “Pass over before me, and put some distance between successive droves.” And he commanded the first one, saying, “When Esau my brother meets you and asks you, saying, ‘To whom do you belong, and where are you going? Whose are these in front of you?’ then you shall say, ‘They are your servant Jacob’s. It is a present sent to my lord Esau; and behold, he also is behind us.’” (NKJV)

It’s hard to blame Jacob for his effort to soften his brother’s heart with enormous gifts. Jacob assumes that Esau is coming to bring retribution to his younger brother for his life changing deceptions of their past. Maybe if Esau is impressed with the gift, Jacob will avoid the calamity he’s expecting. Now, you may not think much of Jacob’s strategy—essentially trying to “buy off” his brother, but take another look. What happens when we begin to show kindness to those we have previously battled? How can acts of kindness soften the heart of an enemy? Proverbs reminds us that a soft answer turns away wrath. When you give goodness to those who are used to something else, the potential for a new relationship begins to form. Jacob may want a new relationship with Esau or he may just be looking for a way to survive the moment. But, his approach brings a new day to this relationship. Your words or acts of kindness may be exactly what’s needed to start the ball rolling in a new direction with someone who has opposed you. It’s certainly worth a try, especially if the old behaviors haven’t brought peace.

– Dr. Mike Clarensau serves as Senior Director of the Healthy Church Network of the Assemblies of God.